What Peter Simon says and the truth.

"This is a far better buy to you than we could have got" (No it's not)

"When they're gone, they're gone" (Well at least until tomorrow)

"These are very unique and we only have 200 of them" (Unique means that only one exists. So what does very unique mean?)

"These are genuine sirwartski crystals" (Swarovski crystals)

"This swiss watch (Chinese) has not only a cabochon crown (plain steel) not only a sapphire facia (glass or plastic crystal) not only bejewelled, (jewelled movement (perhaps)), not only when you put it to your ear it sounds beautiful, (The neighbours will complain to the council about the noise) not only with a black strap with contrasting black stitching (black on black is not a contrast) and is up there with Rolex, Breitling, Max Stuhrling, (low end Chinese brand), Patak (Patek Phillpe) and Tag Haggard" (Tag Heuer).

"Good luck if you get it" (Suckered you)

"I put a bid in for these myself" (Most likely a lie)

"We paid a fortune for these" (Not for that tat you haven't)

"We wanted £40 for these" (So why do they sell for £3.99?)

"You can sell this on!" (Only at a great loss)


There must be many more like that?

"I said to our Bet.........." (he's talking to himself again)

I think I might have spotted another one, not necessarily Peter Simon...but it's the "introductory offer". "We're only able to do these at this very special price because it's an introductory offer" = check us out a few weeks/months down the line selling the same product for the same price!...and the reason we're still selling it so cheap, same as always of course, we bought it dirt cheap and can afford to sell at a seemingly miraculous price 'cause the p&p we're gonna charge you will cover the defecit and a little bit more...happy shopping!

I forgot.

" You can get this for pounds". (sit-up wont accept bananas)

"Just buy!" (But it's rubbish)

"Isn't this fab! "(No)

"This watch has 617 calibration" (WTF is that?)

radio_dayz said:

I forgot.

" You can get this for pounds". (sit-up wont accept bananas)

"Just buy!" (But it's rubbish)

"Isn't this fab! "(No)

"This watch has 617 calibration" (WTF is that?)

Click to expand...

It could sell for a million pounds but they could still correctly say you are getting this for pounds, the low life no good scum.


PJ

Peter Simon giving it some serious blag whilst selling a Thomas Earnshaw watch:


"Thomas Earnshaw was born in 1740. Actually 1752 to be exact." :clapping:

"Its swift and smooth second hand is like skaters on ice." :sleepy:

"A chronometer. Of legend. Of accuracy." :sleepy:

"If you are lucky enough to get an original Earnshaw watch at £69.99, you have done remarkably well." :angry:

Not as well as the people who got this one:

Most likely made by Xiang Earnshaw in Hong Kong.

Well, I've just watched the video above and I've never heard such twaddle and absolute tosh spoken about a chinese watch in all my life! That man should hang his head in shame and apologise to viewers for all of the bolax he spews out!

He is either a liar, or a complete idiot!

Love how they sell the watch as having "With Date Feature" in the description, namely something that's found on all but the cheapest watches.

And can anyone keep a straight face apart from Peter Simon when saying "A chronometer. Of legend. Of accuracy"? Hats off to Peter he still certainly knows how to tell 'em...

"A chronometer. Of legend. Of accuracy."

and.........Of Clearance. :wonder:

'we've got the most extraordinary socks coming up in a minute'...... ok peter ha ha

"Delicious socks. Absolutely magnificent. Not only craftsmanship. Not only attention to detail. Not only style. Not only comfort. Not only precision stitching. These would go for thousands on the high street. We're losing a fortune on these. They're a better buy to you than we could ever have mentioned. Goodluckifyougetem."

He just sold some solar lamps and he said that they had "A 4amp wattage". Plank!!!!!!

Tonight he's been selling skin care made from apples:



He's flogging another Earnshaw watch now. Apparently Thomas Earnshaw was born in the 1850s, whereas a couple of nights ago he was born in 1740 (well 1752 to be exact). He was also a 'creator of time'. I thought only Dr Emmett Brown could do that. :thinking:

"I wish you could just listen to this. It's a cacophony of sound." I thought good watches were supposed to be quiet. :wonder:

He was comparing it to Rolex, Cartier, Accurist (!) and Patrick Pazat (Patek Philippe?). Apparently you'd pay £70 just for a leather strap.

What twaddle! Time the silly old fool was pensioned off.

ca·coph·o·ny
   [kuh-kof-uh-nee] Show IPA

noun, plural ca·coph·o·nies.
1.
harsh discordance of sound; dissonance: a cacophony of hoots, cackles, and wails.

Well done Peter, for once your description of an Earnshaw watch acts as a deterrant!

I certainly won't be buying Earnshaw now. Don't want the whole of Lidl's to know where I am...

Q: "Excuse me, do you have the time?"

A: "No, I have a Thomas Earnshaw."

A magnificent Thomas Brooks 3-pc suit...



...which would apparently cost £180 at Debenhams or £160 at M&S (sale prices). Oddly enough, there is no sign of them being on sale anywhere other than Bid. :wonder:

More lies. How does Peter Simon get away with it.