Random musings and general banter.

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Just caught Pete in the Total Crunch fitness machine hour. I think the male guest has hit on the right formula for working with Pete: 1) talk more - and faster - than he does and shout more, and 2) have Pete actually using the machine, so he's got no breath left. He's been telling us for half an hour how much this machine has done for him (now 34" waist size through using it twice a day for 10 mins). Correction: he's now told us he can fit into 33" waist, so he's obviously lost another inch around his waist during the hour itself.....remarkable!!!. Apart from asking the female to poke his chest (I said his chest - oh, you lot are awful, get back in your cupboards!) he's been remarkably restrained, but only because he's obviously been forbidden to get off the machine even when not using it. The phones have gone mad, just buy it.....

Mr Brittas was telling us that he is a renowned expert in many aspects of health and fitness and how he has coached and trained people all around the world. So now he finds himself in Peterborough, with Dirty Peter Simon, shilling what looks like a SeeSaw for people without a friend to go the playground with.

It must be a 'quieter' period of Mr Brittas' career :mysmilie_59:

image.jpg
 
Mr Brittas was telling us that he is a renowned expert in many aspects of health and fitness and how he has coached and trained people all around the world. So now he finds himself in Peterborough, with Dirty Peter Simon, shilling what looks like a SeeSaw for people without a friend to go the playground with.

It must be a 'quieter' period of Mr Brittas' career :mysmilie_59:

View attachment 11631

Towards the end of the hour Pope Pete was making very loud puffing noises during his exercise, killing himself on his See-Saw whilst Mr. Brittas continued to tell everyone how good it was.

Also worth knowing that the machine's maximum weight limit isn't that high for some reason (not much more than 15 stone) so only really suitable for small people or skeletons :mysmilie_59:
 
Towards the end of the hour Pope Pete was making very loud puffing noises during his exercise, killing himself on his See-Saw whilst Mr. Brittas continued to tell everyone how good it was.

Also worth knowing that the machine's maximum weight limit isn't that high for some reason (not much more than 15 stone) so only really suitable for small people or skeletons :mysmilie_59:

Not much more than 15 Stones?

So that's about 2/3 of a Roly Poly Remblance, or 1/8 of a BIG BRODEL (but only if he's recently dropped anchor) :mysmilie_59:

image.jpgimage.jpg
 
Total Crunch Total sh*t what a load of crap ideal world are selling. Idealworld we are bored with the fitness crap you are selling enough already.
 
Not much more than 15 Stones?

So that's about 2/3 of a Roly Poly Remblance, or 1/8 of a BIG BRODEL (but only if he's recently dropped anchor) :mysmilie_59:

View attachment 11632View attachment 11633

The Crunch weight limit (above which you'll definitely go crunch when the thing breaks) is actually shown on-screen as part of the product description:

View attachment 11631

Maximum User Weight: 15st 7lbs/98kg

Strange thing however is that I've so far never heard anyone on the channel verbally say that limit when they're selling this piece of equipment, despite presenters openly mentioning the Vibrapower's more generous weight limit and ways round it if you're too heavy (namely putting one leg at a time on the Vibrapower).

Draw your own conclusions :wink:
 
Mr Brittas was telling us that he is a renowned expert in many aspects of health and fitness and how he has coached and trained people all around the world. So now he finds himself in Peterborough, with Dirty Peter Simon, shilling what looks like a SeeSaw for people without a friend to go the playground with.

It must be a 'quieter' period of Mr Brittas' career :mysmilie_59:

View attachment 11631

"...telling us that he is a renowned expert in many aspects of health and fitness and how he has coached and trained people all around the world."

There might be some truth in that. I believe his exercise classes have proved very popular...olp.jpg
 
"...telling us that he is a renowned expert in many aspects of health and fitness and how he has coached and trained people all around the world."

There might be some truth in that. I believe his exercise classes have proved very popular...View attachment 11634

Ha Ha :mysmilie_19:

Now I have to say that given the physical state of the Ideal World goons I must conclude that Mr Brittas can't be such a hot shot coach. So he can shove his Total Crunch where the sun don't shine.

And don't get me onto the fat reducing talents of Roly Poly Remblance and BIG BRODEL. They can shove their Courgetti where they shove everything else :mysmilie_59:

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Sally says she doesn't want to call the Tower Microwave a 'Microwave'. Call it what you like, this is Ideal World. She introduced Roly Poly Remblance as a 'Top Professional Chef' so why not call the Microwave something as equally spurious?

Why not call the Microwave an Actor, Model, Film & Stage Crew or Photographer? :mysmilie_59:

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http://www.starnow.co.uk/josephremblance/
 
Sally says she doesn't want to call the Tower Microwave a 'Microwave'. Call it what you like, this is Ideal World. She introduced Roly Poly Remblance as a 'Top Professional Chef' so why not call the Microwave something as equally spurious?

Why not call the Microwave an Actor, Model, Film & Stage Crew or Photographer? :mysmilie_59:

View attachment 11636

http://www.starnow.co.uk/josephremblance/

Nowhere there is "chef" mentioned, how odd, embarrassed? surely not! Must be using IW for a stepping stone into acting or presenting, two words "Peter Simon"..................message for Joe, think you better update that picture love, add a few more lbs and years. :mysmilie_17:
 
Nowhere there is "chef" mentioned, how odd, embarrassed? surely not! Must be using IW for a stepping stone into acting or presenting, two words "Peter Simon"..................message for Joe, think you better update that picture love, add a few more lbs and years. :mysmilie_17:

When she said it (and she always does) he looks slightly awkward but never corrects her. Of course he's no more a Chef than 'Chef' William is.

The irony is that a Selly Telly channel doesn't really require a Chef to demonstrate their products although it's noticeable that Sarah, who as far as I'm aware is the only woman who cooks on Ideal World, is merely billed as a 'Domestic Cook'. So remember:-

Gays on Ideal World must never mention their gayness
Women on Ideal World are only good for the home kitchen
Not Caucasian? Ideal World might not be the place for you

Ideal World seems a bit like a Donald Trump rally, or 1950's Britain which is possibly when many of their punters were born and, strangely, these people might just be OK with diversity :mysmilie_59:
 
When she said it (and she always does) he looks slightly awkward but never corrects her. Of course he's no more a Chef than 'Chef' William is.

The irony is that a Selly Telly channel doesn't really require a Chef to demonstrate their products although it's noticeable that Sarah, who as far as I'm aware is the only woman who cooks on Ideal World, is merely billed as a 'Domestic Cook'. So remember:-

Gays on Ideal World must never mention their gayness
Women on Ideal World are only good for the home kitchen
Not Caucasian? Ideal World might not be the place for you

Ideal World seems a bit like a Donald Trump rally, or 1950's Britain which is possibly when many of their punters were born and, strangely, these people might just be OK with diversity :mysmilie_59:

Men do get mentioned when they're selling "female-orientated" beauty products but you get the distinct impression that's just done to sell more product as opposed to any serious attempt at inclusivity as they don't reciprocate when selling products with "male-orientated" marketing.

As for the dreaded forthcoming EU Referendum, all the presenters should vote 'Leave', as in "Leave the studio right now and don't come back" :mysmilie_59:
 
Men do get mentioned when they're selling "female-orientated" beauty products but you get the distinct impression that's just done to sell more product as opposed to any serious attempt at inclusivity as they don't reciprocate when selling products with "male-orientated" marketing.

As for the dreaded forthcoming EU Referendum, all the presenters should vote 'Leave', as in "Leave the studio right now and don't come back" :mysmilie_59:

Quite. I hope they leave the studio and then leave Europe.

The Continent, not the Union :mysmilie_59:
 
Men do get mentioned when they're selling "female-orientated" beauty products but you get the distinct impression that's just done to sell more product as opposed to any serious attempt at inclusivity as they don't reciprocate when selling products with "male-orientated" marketing.

As for the dreaded forthcoming EU Referendum, all the presenters should vote 'Leave', as in "Leave the studio right now and don't come back" :mysmilie_59:

Maybe we should get a second referendum, asking us which high of the high quality, professional, experienced presenters on Ideal World should stay or go. I have a feeling that if we did there would be a lot of vacancies in the Peterborough area the next day...
 
Well lookie here, aluminum framed rattan garden furniture straight from China :D
1 rattan: PE rattan with aluminum frame,water and fire proof
2 frame constructure:sturdy,strong and light weight with good powder coating aluminum frame,never rust, the surface is treated with powder coated and oxidation and sensational fastness.
3 color and size are optional,it also can be according to the design and requirement of customers.
4 Cushion::easily removable cushion and cover with high desity foam
5 it's suitable for you to be used in indoor house and outdoor place,to feel comfortable
6 three years guarantee use
7 this items of the constructure is very strong and light weight,also very conmfortable
8 water and UV resistant synthetical rattan,can be exposed in all weather elements.UV-resistance SGS tested
9 the design are good to save the container space,so it could save the shipment cost
10 this style are worthy and have big loadabity,also the price is cheap
 
Well lookie here, aluminum framed rattan garden furniture straight from China :D
1 rattan: PE rattan with aluminum frame,water and fire proof
2 frame constructure:sturdy,strong and light weight with good powder coating aluminum frame,never rust, the surface is treated with powder coated and oxidation and sensational fastness.
3 color and size are optional,it also can be according to the design and requirement of customers.
4 Cushion::easily removable cushion and cover with high desity foam
5 it's suitable for you to be used in indoor house and outdoor place,to feel comfortable
6 three years guarantee use
7 this items of the constructure is very strong and light weight,also very conmfortable
8 water and UV resistant synthetical rattan,can be exposed in all weather elements.UV-resistance SGS tested
9 the design are good to save the container space,so it could save the shipment cost
10 this style are worthy and have big loadabity,also the price is cheap

Let me tell you something.

What hope did we have for good value, quality Garden Furniture when they sell effin' Pleather Plop Bin Bag ripoff carp for us to sit on inside the house? And as usual the typically schlocky Ideal World 'expert' was a desperate lack of quality warning too.


But who cares when you can spread the (breathtaking) cost with FlexiPay? It's just like having a Magic Money Tree :mysmilie_59:
 
Couldnt belive my eyes and ears today when I saw IW selling a HOSE yes a hose, now this hose was a 50 ft green garden hose, this was not the best since sliced bread Xhose that IW like to tell us is the replacement for yip you've guessed it......................for our OLD USELESS OUT OF DATE GARDEN HOSE'S

The bare faced brazen cheek of IW is beyond belief, not to worry the Xhose will be back tomorrow and we will be geting patronised and taken for mugs being told we no longer need a garden hose:mysmilie_59::talking::down:
 
Couldnt belive my eyes and ears today when I saw IW selling a HOSE yes a hose, now this hose was a 50 ft green garden hose, this was not the best since sliced bread Xhose that IW like to tell us is the replacement for yip you've guessed it......................for our OLD USELESS OUT OF DATE GARDEN HOSE'S

The bare faced brazen cheek of IW is beyond belief, not to worry the Xhose will be back tomorrow and we will be geting patronised and taken for mugs being told we no longer need a garden hose:mysmilie_59::talking::down:

I know, laughable isn't in it

And did Sally trawl out her usual 'Hosepipe Ban' scare story that she gives when shilling the Williams Waterless Car Cleaner?

Answers on a postcard :mysmilie_59:
 
Men do get mentioned when they're selling "female-orientated" beauty products but you get the distinct impression that's just done to sell more product as opposed to any serious attempt at inclusivity as they don't reciprocate when selling products with "male-orientated" marketing.

As for the dreaded forthcoming EU Referendum, all the presenters should vote 'Leave', as in "Leave the studio right now and don't come back" :mysmilie_59:

I would vote for that.
 
If you'll indulge me for a moment I feel a need to convey Dirty Peter's take on Plastic Rattan:-

Whether it's from the roof overlooking Central Park
Whether it's in Louis XVI overlooking Rome
Or Paris in the Mamarshes
This is a lifestyle of millionaires
It's is comfort, it sinks

Anyway, forget all that. Get a load of these two Honky Tonks :mysmilie_12:

image.jpg
 
If you'll indulge me for a moment I feel a need to convey Dirty Peter's take on Plastic Rattan:-

Whether it's from the roof overlooking Central Park
Whether it's in Louis XVI overlooking Rome
Or Paris in the Mamarshes
This is a lifestyle of millionaires
It's is comfort, it sinks

Anyway, forget all that. Get a load of these two Honky Tonks :mysmilie_12:

View attachment 11640

Worst gay porno ever
 

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