What rules and regs would you enforce if you were in QVC Personell department?

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Perhaps IW can get one of those zappers for Pope Peter! Failing that, an electric cattle prod?

If Q decide to bring in the dog collar style zappers then I`m sure they can tart them up with Eek stones or maybe BW can design one covered in tarty looking crystals and a bulldog motif , Lola Rose would make one with a friendship bracelet fastening so it fits all neck sizes or LG could make one with a lips charm hanging from it and the collar in a choice of red or black patent, the possibilities could be endless. They could become a big seller !
 
I would send home any presenter who turned up with her roots showing - especially our "Beauty Expert Qualified In All Areas". It's just tacky.
 
Q to be broadcast on HD platform, so we can all really see the wonderful difference in the 'before and after' stills used of those hapless models using Alisons miracle potions on her 'expert' beauty shows.
 
Q to be broadcast on HD platform, so we can all really see the wonderful difference in the 'before and after' stills used of those hapless models using Alisons miracle potions on her 'expert' beauty shows.

There were rumours a couple of years ago that Q would be broadcasting in HD.
 
Don't forget the enhanced HD chest hair from Simon and DelBoy!

What! Is Ms Flint having to sell chest wigs that didn't sell on her market stall??? I'm sure Mr Biagi pours flower power over his chest hair to get it to grow that much. Wish he'd keep it under wraps though, it's most offputting.

CC
 
Oooh.

Let's zap for

girly giggling and hair flicking (yes you, Queen Bee Julia)

References to how long they've been presenting the Q (it ain't a competition, and length of service sometimes means you've got worse!

Too tight clothes (Julia). Leggings (Debbie). Too much eyeliner (AY)

Guests who wear jangly jewellery and then pat the bedding, over and over in childlike gestures with their fingers spread. I now turn over when that dratted woman appears.

Any presenter who twitters about their private life more than once an hour. And that's pushing it!

Jerking and shaking jewellery in a close up (Franks)

I love all the other suggestions too!
 
Zap Miceal every time he refers to his fashion design credentials.
Zap Catherine every time she self-deprecates.
Zap Claire whenever she's being twee.
Zap Richard Jackson - just because!
Zap Dale when he makes flirts at the camera.
I'd save an extra-powerful zap for Debbie when she's correcting guests and telling them what to say and how to say it.
 
I'd save an extra-powerful zap for Debbie when she's correcting guests and telling them what to say and how to say it.


I think an extra powerful zap on that finger too!

Q could have a swear box for charity, to redeem themselves of the past, whilst the presenters get used to their new working conditions.
 
To look in a mirror before they come on air, and if wigs are to be worn (yes Marvarine) then perhaps they should look more natural, and not shiny nylon jobs !
 
To look in a mirror before they come on air, and if wigs are to be worn (yes Marvarine) then perhaps they should look more natural, and not shiny nylon jobs !


Not a wig, I don't believe - here's what she put in a blog not long after starting with QVC:

Hair today, gone tomorrow
November 19, 2013 By Marverine Cole

Next week you’ll see me sporting curly tresses again. I alternate between that hair do and my straight do. Just taking a short break from my extensions, because if I leave them in too long, my own hair underneath is prone to damage. In fact, it’s the curly look I have in the blog photo and also in this video when Will and I had a good old natter back in September whilst I was rehearsing for my first shows! Can you believe it’s been 7 weeks now?? There’ve been over 6,000 hits on this. Yikes!!
 
I'd zap DBF.
I'd zap Micael.
I'd zap the garden gnome.
I'd zap Julia when she's wearing a size small.
I'd zap mecharlie on any food or teddy bear show.
I'd zap anyone who wears their hair long and lank without any shaping.
I'd zap any item of clothing with a hint of an embellishment.
I'd zap all beauty hours after the obligatory one per day.
 
There is only one rule and regulation needed: give the details of the products - don't let the whittering replace the information. Julia is the best at the job: she gives the information, and she points out any issues that people may find with something - she also fits in the right amount of chat but not at the expense of the information.
 
I'd zap :-

Any presenter that self promotes on air (talking to you DF)
Simpering Chuntley every time she slags off the DHS
Simon Biagi for being cheesy and showing disgusting chest hair
Julia Roberts every time she's sarcastic to a guest making them feel uncomfortable
Alison Young (no you're not a qualified beauty expert) every time she looks at the wrong camera
Any presenter every time they lie and patronise the viewer and bombards them with hard sell (talking to you DF)

Ahh that's better! :mysmilie_14:
 

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