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loveallthingsitalian said:
Indeed. Many people think that because it is what they perceive to be "self inflicted " it should be easy to "sort yourself out". Anyone who has experience knows that it is a terrible thing to live with so if someone has managed to come through the other side they should be given all the credit in the world.

You never fully understand things like alcohol, drugs or mental health until you have walked in their shoes.
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One that I have been battling with all my life (and I am sure others have (sorry not pre-judging anyone here but I am sure that what I am about to impart will ring true for some (possibly)), is weight, in the streets you get pre-judged (which is to be expected and begrudgingly accepted (I know people shouldn't pre-judge but the world we live in is all about a 'good presence'), what I find highly infuriating though is when I go to the doctors and can't be seen and diagnosed (even though I know what it is that is wrong and which department I need to go to (ok their may have been a bit of 'Dr Google', but still...), but because the doctor only sees 'the weight', I don't get referred to the right department (or the department I think I need to go to), it is OK saying go back, but when it takes around 6 months from start to finish to go through one department then get bounced back and have to start the whole 'rigmarole' again it is a tad 'soul destroying' therefore I haven't bothered. I know weight management is seen as a 'lifestyle issue' that is why if I think it is something connected with my weight I won't go to see the doctor (mine is patronising rather than 'bed side manar), the issue I am referring to wasn't anything to do with my weight, but because those were the departments they were referring me to I gave up!

Sorry for the 'share', it just annoys me, more help is given towards (and I am not saying this flippantly as I know each are just as bad in their own way), alcoholics, smokers etc and people with weight issues are put on a 'back burner', because it is just that we have no self-control/will power or we don't do enough exercise. I am healthy, I can do a mile in around 12 minutes, but of course the doctors don't see that (sorry I will shut up with regards to this, this is one 'vox box' that really gets me riled)!
 
yorkrose26 said:
One that I have been battling with all my life (and I am sure others have (sorry not pre-judging anyone here but I am sure that what I am about to impart will ring true for some (possibly)), is weight, in the streets you get pre-judged (which is to be expected and begrudgingly accepted (I know people shouldn't pre-judge but the world we live in is all about a 'good presence'), what I find highly infuriating though is when I go to the doctors and can't be seen and diagnosed (even though I know what it is that is wrong and which department I need to go to (ok their may have been a bit of 'Dr Google', but still...), but because the doctor only sees 'the weight', I don't get referred to the right department (or the department I think I need to go to), it is OK saying go back, but when it takes around 6 months from start to finish to go through one department then get bounced back and have to start the whole 'rigmarole' again it is a tad 'soul destroying' therefore I haven't bothered. I know weight management is seen as a 'lifestyle issue' that is why if I think it is something connected with my weight I won't go to see the doctor (mine is patronising rather than 'bed side manar), the issue I am referring to wasn't anything to do with my weight, but because those were the departments they were referring me to I gave up!

Sorry for the 'share', it just annoys me, more help is given towards (and I am not saying this flippantly as I know each are just as bad in their own way), alcoholics, smokers etc and people with weight issues are put on a 'back burner', because it is just that we have no self-control/will power or we don't do enough exercise. I am healthy, I can do a mile in around 12 minutes, but of course the doctors don't see that (sorry I will shut up with regards to this, this is one 'vox box' that really gets me riled)!
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Oh Yorkrose (you are a fellow Yorkie I presume) chin up .xx
 
I hear you Yorkrose- I have struggled to with my weight all my adult life. It has made me feel 2nd rate and prevented me from enjoying life in general. Same as you every health professional I've ever seen has started their Consultation with BMI or pointing out where I sit on the obesity chart!

Like you I am active and reasonably fit can swim 50 lengths without stopping but have struggled significantly more since the menopause and cannot shift the weight.

I just wish I could like myself more.
 
I have a common name and there are several of us in my surgery list. Before it was all computerised the doc got a pile of files every session and 9/10 he had another persons file when it was my appointment. The reason I knew it wasn't mine, and therefore was luckily able to point it out, was that there was a huge red sticker "Smoker" on the front.

I can imagine that patient had an uphill struggle to have any symptom accepted as not associated with being a smoker.
 
I think some people do ramp up their degree of abstention just so they can be all preachy to others. If you eat a pie that was made with ale, the alcohol will have been neutralised during cooking. Should ex-offenders for knife crime not ever touch another knife, not even a plastic one, for the rest of their days? It's not the alcohol that's the problem, it's their mentality / life issues. There's nothing wrong with the odd little drink here and there. If anyone gets dependent on anything it can be an issue. The same principle applies to the knife. It will sit there quite happily on the table and not do anyone any harm. If someone chooses to plunge it into someone it is their thoughts and actions that are the problem, not the knife. I think people's over-vilification of alcohol is ridiculous! I got dragged into a meeting in HR at work for making a comment to a Muslim colleague who was talking about not using hand sanitiser gel. I said: "Well maybe Allah will stem to some mystical antisepsis, but then again maybe he won't!" He accused me of making fun of him. At the meeting I said that was exactly what I was doing, and if his beliefs were truly valid they would stand up to close scrutiny.
 
I would never question anyone's statement that they didn't take alcohol- apart from just being a legitimate lifestyle. choice, how would you possibly know what their reason behind it is. It should just be accepted, full stop!

That obviously does not mean they can preach or dictate to others.
 
There is absolutely nothing wrong with the odd little drink here and there.....unless you are alcoholic, then there is.

No-one would ever encourage an ex Heroin addict to have a little fix now and again.

I never question why someone choses not to take alcohol it doesn't really feel like I would need to.
 
It's very much those people who have the appalling bad manners to comment on childlessness. Apart from anything else WTF business is it of anyone other than the childless person.
 
yorkrose26 said:
One that I have been battling with all my life (and I am sure others have (sorry not pre-judging anyone here but I am sure that what I am about to impart will ring true for some (possibly)), is weight, in the streets you get pre-judged (which is to be expected and begrudgingly accepted (I know people shouldn't pre-judge but the world we live in is all about a 'good presence'), what I find highly infuriating though is when I go to the doctors and can't be seen and diagnosed (even though I know what it is that is wrong and which department I need to go to (ok their may have been a bit of 'Dr Google', but still...), but because the doctor only sees 'the weight', I don't get referred to the right department (or the department I think I need to go to), it is OK saying go back, but when it takes around 6 months from start to finish to go through one department then get bounced back and have to start the whole 'rigmarole' again it is a tad 'soul destroying' therefore I haven't bothered. I know weight management is seen as a 'lifestyle issue' that is why if I think it is something connected with my weight I won't go to see the doctor (mine is patronising rather than 'bed side manar), the issue I am referring to wasn't anything to do with my weight, but because those were the departments they were referring me to I gave up!

Sorry for the 'share', it just annoys me, more help is given towards (and I am not saying this flippantly as I know each are just as bad in their own way), alcoholics, smokers etc and people with weight issues are put on a 'back burner', because it is just that we have no self-control/will power or we don't do enough exercise. I am healthy, I can do a mile in around 12 minutes, but of course the doctors don't see that (sorry I will shut up with regards to this, this is one 'vox box' that really gets me riled)!
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I used to get that all the time. It was either my weight or my smoking. Now I've lost around 15 stone and stopped smoking and medical people still try and say sometimes that I could stand to lose a stone. Makes me mad!
 
Sussex Shopper said:
I used to get that all the time. It was either my weight or my smoking. Now I've lost around 15 stone and stopped smoking and medical people still try and say sometimes that I could stand to lose a stone. Makes me mad!
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I'm a size 14 but used to be a size 10 and have had dodgy knees since I was a kid (malformed cartilage that worsens with age) but I've given up going to the doctors about them as they don't bother reading my notes, they just say I need to lose some weight and then they will get better. I've also been told on umpteen occasions that my spotty skin would clear up if I had a baby.
 
People get judged too much on their lifestyles and even the doctors can't agree what we should and should not be doing.Have a drink....don't have one. Eat fruit.... no it could rot teeth.Have a drink to help the heart .....oh no don't. If a person lives in moderation with everything then surely that's ok.As to smoking we know the risks but it's down to choice.I am a size 8 no longer smoke and have arthritis in my hips.As a child my parents were told the awful pain which I now believe was due to Perthe's Disease was 'imaginary' ,as a means to avoid school.I loved school -it was my favourite place! No op' for me until the cartilage has worn away enough and at present I am 'too young'.Being told that stopping smoking or losing weight obviously will help to some extent for some people depending on the condition. What next when you have worked so hard?I also know for a fact there are lots of people who have not smoked,drank,and/or were of slim build.They too had their share of unpleasant conditions. The only way I found to get help with my hips as an adult was to go back to the doctors.......a lot.Tried the tablets.The physio'.Then asked to be referred.If the doctor won't refer you to a specialist or tries to fob you off, see another in the same practice if you can .They should at least be willing in the first place to offer appropriate medication and not always suggest a problem can be totally cured by a lifestyle change.
 
Even when you give up "bad" things they hang it over your head that some of the damage has already been done - just can't win.

No one has the perfect lifestyle their entire life.

Look at Jill Franks, eats nothing, doesn't drink, excerises excessively, has a beauty routine beyond belief and I would rather live a year less than live and look like that.
 
loveallthingsitalian said:
Even when you give up "bad" things they hang it over your head that some of the damage has already been done - just can't win.

No one has the perfect lifestyle their entire life.

Look at Jill Franks, eats nothing, doesn't drink, excerises excessively, has a beauty routine beyond belief and I would rather live a year less than live and look like that.
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Agree with all of this.Especially the bit about JF.
 
Mazza said:
I agree. Does he says he is teetotal or does he say I don't drink alcohol? Not that I care either way but that might explain how he sees a difference. I always thought alcohol burnt off in hot sauces but don't know about other dishes. I come from a family where one side had a Methodist old school TT background (it didn't stretch to me though!!!!!) and I can remember the palaver over sherry trifles for Xmas! (In fact I don't like sherry so didn't have any in mine either.)
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I also come from a Methodist Background, yet when I say to people I don't drink, they get confused as they know that Christians do drink (Jesus indeed turned water into wine) (sorry I know this is a forum of non-partisan(from any affiliations))), so I then have to explain to them the ethos of the founder (John Wesley), this is partly (and a seemingly acceptable excuse), rather than I 'just don't, as if I bring Religion into they can't sway me, rather than if I 'just don't, they then is always the temptation to 'lead me into sin'!

Sorry that was a Religiousy post, but given the day of the week, I suppose it can be rather apt!
 
yorkrose26 said:
I also come from a Methodist Background, yet when I say to people I don't drink, they get confused as they know that Christians do drink (Jesus indeed turned water into wine) (sorry I know this is a forum of non-partisan(from any affiliations))), so I then have to explain to them the ethos of the founder (John Wesley), this is partly (and a seemingly acceptable excuse), rather than I 'just don't, as if I bring Religion into they can't sway me, rather than if I 'just don't, they then is always the temptation to 'lead me into sin'!

Sorry that was a Religiousy post, but given the day of the week, I suppose it can be rather apt!
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When I was at infant school our teacher told us the story of Jesus turning water into wine. i asked why he wanted to get pissed! The teacher was furious and sent me to the headmistress's office! I always thought the parables were rather strange. Wasn't there one about 2 fish and 5 loaves of bread being magically multiplied to feed the masses? Also wasn't there one about him walking on water?
 
Julius said:
When I was at infant school our teacher told us the story of Jesus turning water into wine. i asked why he wanted to get pissed! The teacher was furious and sent me to the headmistress's office! I always thought the parables were rather strange. Wasn't there one about 2 fish and 5 loaves of bread being magically multiplied to feed the masses? Also wasn't there one about him walking on water?
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Yes, he knew where the stepping stones were
 
Me too! And if the regime she follows is supposed to make you look healthy, then I'm Ivana Trump.

QUOTE=loveallthingsitalian;899765]Even when you give up "bad" things they hang it over your head that some of the damage has already been done - just can't win.

No one has the perfect lifestyle their entire life.

Look at Jill Franks, eats nothing, doesn't drink, excerises excessively, has a beauty routine beyond belief and I would rather live a year less than live and look like that.[/QUOTE]
 

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