Pointless / fake demos

Shopping TV is renowned for its clichéd demos. Which ones do you find the worst?

Personally I can't stand the carpet cleaning ones where they "make a mess" on a carpet tile and then "miraculously" remove it - when it's fairly obvious the tile has been treated with Scotchguard and the dirt is just "telly dirt." And then they squeeze ketchup / etc over the tile. It's all trickery.

I used to hate the miracle metal cleaner ones where they'd passed spoons through flame just to get some superficial oxidation that they removed with bicarb.

I also don't get the pointless lathering of hands in a bowl - yes Alexis, I'm talking about you - we all know that soap lathers - we don't need to see it.

As for that Fred Talbot lookey-likey who makes a mess on the carpet tile, I'd like to take the squeezy ketchup bottle and squeeze it it his FACE. Take THAT! and THAT! And mustard, and brown sauce, and Worcester sauce and coffee, and say: "now don't EVER appear on my TV screen again, and begone with you!"

Julius said:

As for that Fred Talbot lookey-likey who makes a mess on the carpet tile, I'd like to take the squeezy ketchup bottle and squeeze it it his FACE. Take THAT! and THAT! And mustard, and brown sauce, and Worcester sauce and coffee, and say: "now don't EVER appear on my TV screen again, and begone with you!"

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Whoa! Calm down there, Julius!

If you're talking about that irritating little man that does the steam cleaning demos then I am second in the queue to punch his lights out. Why does he fuel such aggression??? :mysmilie_455:

I hate anything Lorna Ko demo's along with that stupid crap about living near Heathrow and her water feature drowning out the sound of the planes. Really? I mean, really really? I'd tie her to the runway and see if the water feature drowns out the sound of her screams as a 747 taxis towards her . . . .

I'm not usually that horrid btw but Julius started it :mysmilie_17:

CC

As soon as I hear "kills ninety nine per......." can't turn the channel over quick enough.

The demos that I find utterly ridiculous are the ones were they say they never thought they'd like it, but you know what they really do, and they then laugh that humble laugh in the utter disbelief that they didn't try it sooner (Katy Pulloneover, or at least she tries too, is one of the worse for this) and they laugh at how silly they are, and indeed you if you don't try it, an add on to that is when their family/friend/friend of the family really, really, really, really, likes it.

The only good point about vacuum cleaner demos is when they go wrong, and won't even pick up polystyrene beads, like that hilarious demo with Charlie (who couldn't stop laughing) and that unfortunate female demonstrator Catherine (I think) who had the nickname on a previous forum of SVL (strict vacuum lady).

She ended up in tears.

I've posted this link many times, but here it is for anyone who hasn't seen it. It still makes me laugh, and has had well over 1 million views.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-UY7pWCQxTY

I cannot bear the pointless hours and hours and hours of demos from Elemis,Gatineau,Decleor etc on how to apply face and neck creams and all the absolute verbal drivel that accompanies it.
I dont know of anyone who cant apply a face cream or anyone who believes all the verbal claptrap either!!
Cut it down by 2/3 at least.

I also am driven mad by the Vionic shoes chap and his black marker pen lines on legs demo.

Oh and the shapewear undies with the ladies in bikini briefs and an ill fitting lycra frock who then miraculously lose 5 stone wearing a pair of big squashyinny pants!

I can`t stand it when beauty reps plus Ali Young say a product will reduce puffiness/firm a double chin/help bingo wings/blur wrinkles/make lips fuller etc etc etc and yet both beauty rep and AY still have puffy eyes, wrinkles, thin lips and so on. Yes I do know AY is now over 50 and many of the beauty reps are advancing in age too and are showing the same signs of ageing as the rest of us but please don`t try to sell us a product about which you can talk the talk but the product obviously doesn`t walk the walk. We have EYES !

stratobuddy said:

The only good point about vacuum cleaner demos is when they go wrong, and won't even pick up polystyrene beads, like that hilarious demo with Charlie (who couldn't stop laughing) and that unfortunate female demonstrator Catherine (I think) who had the nickname on a previous forum of SVL (strict vacuum lady).

She ended up in tears.

I've posted this link many times, but here it is for anyone who hasn't seen it. It still makes me laugh, and has had well over 1 million views.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-UY7pWCQxTY

Click to expand...

Is it fair to say that Charlie's stock rose with the audience by totally sandbagging her instead of trying to cover it up haha

he was practically "you're on your own here"

The super-dooper garden tools that hoick weeds out of the ground with no effort. Their demo would’ve more effective if they used a proper flower bed instead of their loose-filled wooden box.

I remember a demo recorded at the Ideal Home Show or similar event, it was for a mandoline slicer. The man who did all the slicing & dicing was a fairly dour person but could he get through a cabbage at record speed. My favourite part was when he took an orange & reduced it to a line of paper thin discs, at which point he said: "One orange, twenty kids ****** marvellous".

Mine are: models spraying perfume....we can't smell it!
hair demo before photos....the models don't have hair that bad when we see them on other shows.
Washing hands in bowls of water, repeatedly with each different product....we can't smell them!

Presenters on Yankee for example, saying they don't usually like the smell of rose, but they love this one :dull:
food shows....everything is delicious, even when it's obviously not.

mr tom said:

Is it fair to say that Charlie's stock rose with the audience by totally sandbagging her instead of trying to cover it up haha

he was practically "you're on your own here"

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He did a demo with a cordless telephone / answering machine once - and it went all wrong - for 9 minutes! Was very funny to watch. I remember one with the cyclonic milkshake maker / blender and they put cubes of chocolate in - but didn't put the lid on correctly - and it sent a stream of chocolate milkshake over Julia Roberts's dress. She laughed it off but you could tell she was really not happy. (Understandable as it probably ruined the dress).

Lemonsqueezy said:

I cannot bear the pointless hours and hours and hours of demos from Elemis,Gatineau,Decleor etc on how to apply face and neck creams and all the absolute verbal drivel that accompanies it.
I dont know of anyone who cant apply a face cream or anyone who believes all the verbal claptrap either!!
Cut it down by 2/3 at least.

I also am driven mad by the Vionic shoes chap and his black marker pen lines on legs demo.

Oh and the shapewear undies with the ladies in bikini briefs and an ill fitting lycra frock who then miraculously lose 5 stone wearing a pair of big squashyinny pants!

Click to expand...

Or how about the one where the models were REMOVING the control garments and letting the muffin tops splurge out horrendously everywhere like a Pilsbury dough woman in an explosion!?

Twilight said:

I remember a demo recorded at the Ideal Home Show or similar event, it was for a mandoline slicer. The man who did all the slicing & dicing was a fairly dour person but could he get through a cabbage at record speed. My favourite part was when he took an orange & reduced it to a line of paper thin discs, at which point he said: "One orange, twenty kids ****** marvellous".

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Yes, JML used to do those mandoline things. They always looked impressive. I'm pretty sure as a child we had a complete kit called the Rap'Tou. If I remember rightly it has a suction base that stuck to the kitchen worktop and could slice onions super fast. There was another gadget for slicing hard-boiled eggs (which we never used as none of us ate eggs) and some other thing that made chips and vegetable juliennes / fancy shapes out of radishes etc.

mr tom said:

Is it fair to say that Charlie's stock rose with the audience by totally sandbagging her instead of trying to cover it up haha

he was practically "you're on your own here"

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Probably because she kept saying "shut up Charlie" every time he offered to help.

Most of the demonstrations listed above are on my "I won't watch that" list.

I know how to apply cream, I know how to wash my hands, I know how to steam clean a floor, I know how to vacuum the house ...... and the list goes on.

And as for the hour long shows about how to use that overpriced hairdryer, well ..... I do just as good a job on the cool setting of my £10 one from Tesco.

QVC must assume that most of their watching customers are incapable of performing the simplest of tasks when we all know that we are not.

For me it's the before and after photos to demonstrate the effectiveness of whichever gloop in a jar they are flogging.
In the before photo the model is usually looking as miserable as sin without any makeup and in the after the model is sporting a beaming smile in full makeup.

SusieSue said:

For me it's the before and after photos to demonstrate the effectiveness of whichever gloop in a jar they are flogging.
In the before photo the model is usually looking as miserable as sin without any makeup and in the after the model is sporting a beaming smile in full makeup.

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the trick is usually that the after photo is really the before photo and then the model/actor lets themselves go a bit, to get the reverse effect. Especially for fitness product photos.

Loving the responses to this thread so far. So many fun things people are pointing out! LOL!