hopefully a funny story - day at mate's house

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merryone

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Got a phonecall from "control freak" friend (I've posted about her antics before). Are you busy this Saturday?, No I said, well she said it's Mark's birthday (her son now aged 26), I know, I said i've got a card and pressie for him (I usually get him a little something). Well do you fancy coming over to us? It'll be a good day, late morning ok for you? Can't see why not I said, look forward to it!
Conversation turned to Xmas, I was telling how we played this jolly good board game based on guessing what one another would do in certain situations....Oooh she said, sounds good, bring it with you.

Ate a very small breakfast as her home is normally heaving with food, which she makes you feel rude if you refuse anything she offers. Grabbed the pressies, and a couple of lovely bottles of wine.

Arrived at my destination, first funny thing happens, son Mark answers the door, sorry Suz, they're out, but they said they won't be long ...cup of tea? Had a cup of tea chatted to Mark for about an hour ( which turned out to be the best part of the day!). Friend and hubby arrived after the obligatory hug and air kisses I handed her the bottles of wine to which she briskly put away in her cupboard!!! Cup of tea? No thanks I said, what about a glass of wine? Now you're talking, I thought she literally turned round and picked up a half opened bottle of Lambrini from the work surface and poured some into a glass. Standing in the kitchen I noticed a couple of slow cookers on the bubble, the bread maker exuding beautiful smells around the kitchen, she switched on the oven...great I thought, looking forward to this great meal! Dinner will be about half an hour she said...as she reached into the freezer and grabbed a bag of oven chips and a bag of Sainsbury's best economy sausage rolls, must be for the kids, her hubby's sister and their kids were staying. Turned out though that this culinary treat was for us, as she cheerfully announced that Bev and the kids wouldn't be coming down 'cause they're upstairs with the norovirus!!!!! GGGGrrrrrreat!

The meal - Mate, hubby, other friend of theirs who'd been invited, and the birthday boy sat down to dine, the plates were placed before us (turned out that the array of treats cooking away in the kitchen was some batch cooking she was doing for the rest of the week!) OMG! She screamed, there's something missing, she winked at Brian her hubby, she jumped up from the table and returned with an enormous jar of pickled onions - Made them myself she simpered, just tell me if they aren't the best pickled onions you've ever tasted? Thus ensued a twenty minute conversation about how wonderful these onions were...yep, they were good, but tbh Sarsons won't be losing any sleep! My mind wandered to how the rest of the day would pan out....perhaps this light lunch was just to keep us going until later. They live a stone's throw away from one of those cut price carvery pubs, after all it was her son's birthday, perhaps he'd be going out later, who knows.

Mate suggested that I get the game I was talking about out and we have a quick game. The quick game, whilst fun, took an hour and a half and immediately after we had a winner, she insisted that we play it all over again!!!!! bearing in mind that the other guest has the knack of deliberately mispronouncing words for comic effect, and erupting into laughter himself, and by the time everyone else had stopped laughing a question that would normally take about half a minute to read out takes at least five!!!!!, and every time a work related question arose, she used it as an opportunity to tell us how she was "head hunted" by two teams! We played another equally long game after which it became apparent that the evening's entertainment consisted of watching not one, but two lengthy tv progs....Atlantis and Pemberley? that I had not only not been following but had absolutely no interest in...so much for the pub!

Eventually I decided to play up the cold I was just getting over and told them I'd suddenly come over feeling somewhat unwell and would catch the train home sometime in the next hour!!

Got home at about 8.30 - home sweet home....very strange day, very strange indeed!
 
Oh dear Merryone, I see what you mean and not even a slice of birthday cake.
Still how does the saying go 'There's nowt strange as folk!'

It made me smile because I think in the past I have experienced something similar.

Carole
 
Merryone...new year, new friends maybe...! Had to laugh but I don't suppose it was very entertaining for you!
 
Tbh, I was bemused from start to finish. If I'd invited myself, or had just turned up on the day, then I can understand things going the way the went - but she invited me! Had I invited guests round I would lay on some decent food and wine, or ask them if they fancied going out to eat, especially on a special occasion like a birthday. What bemuses me more is how financially well of her and her husband are, as far as I could see they spent next to nothing on gifts for her son, I appreciate this time of year is hard with xmas and all that, but as I said they've both got extremely well paid jobs and don't we know it lol!

Had I invited someone to my house and I had people suffering from norovirus, I would have called them and suggested me meet up somewhere else. It was awkward, I was half scared to use the toilet in case someone needed it more urgently!!!! yep they've got more than one toilet, but there was more than one person with norovirus, and she kept announcing how she was going to go in and give the bathroom a quick "once over" to get rid of the germs!

Like you say, there's nowt as strange as folk!
 
merryone, that is not someone you would class as a friend.

I myself am having a "friend" for lunch and because she is on a diet (not medical) she has given me a list of items she wont eat and not allowed to cook for her!!
 
I would have left immediately the word norovirus was mentioned - I always get it if it is doing the rounds.
 
I would have left immediately the word norovirus was mentioned - I always get it if it is doing the rounds.

Believe me, I was tempted tbh, it did make me feel pretty uneasy a) for the fact that I could possibly end up catching it myself, and b) for the chance that I may well hear someone vomitting in the background which frankly would have set me off any way! Thankfully this didn't happen.

As I said before, had I been the hostess, I most definitely would have changed the date, or the venue.


I think though the worst part of the day was the revolting "meal" she served up ..****** oven chips! They weren't even decent oven chips either, they were the supermarket budget ones as were the sausage rolls....All this from the woman who considers herself to be a ****** good cook, even if she says so herself! I, on the other hand am not the best cook in the world, but I sure as hell could have rustled up something a lot nicer than that!
 
merryone, that is not someone you would class as a friend.

I myself am having a "friend" for lunch and because she is on a diet (not medical) she has given me a list of items she wont eat and not allowed to cook for her!!


OMG Yazrose...Just spotted the "not medical" part - what a flippin' cheek eh? Fair enough tell the host if you can't stand or are allergic to shellfish lets say, but to dictate like that - Tempting to say...bring your own ****** food you fussy cow, no better still eat your dinner at home and I'll see you after!
 
Well she wont be coming, I have a tummy bug from my mums nursing home, I wouldn't have minded the if I had asked what she wanted. Well in truth, she normally just states what she wants anyway before coming. Once she wanted a full roast dinner when I invited her, I made chicken curry and her face was a picture.

When you go to visit her she expects you to stay the entire day, but when she goes to other people she stays max 2 hours cause she can't leave the dogs and parrots locked in.

She also once told me, when discussing christmas presents, that she could only wear white gold, she wanted a specific white gold set, despite wearing a pair of silver pearl earrings I bought her the christmas previous, she was under the impression they were white gold, I didn't say anything ;-)

She is just that way inclined, her way or nothing and she is losing friends.
 

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