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fredab

Registered Shopper
Joined
Oct 27, 2009
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505
stuffing her face in the KR meat hour in her awful qwapper factory top with close ups of the meat and her - uurrrrgh. Her comment before I switched over something along the lines of she could stuff the whole lot. She would have to fight the two roly polys first! Its enough to turn me vegetarian:puke:
 
stuffing her face in the KR meat hour in her awful qwapper factory top with close ups of the meat and her - uurrrrgh. Her comment before I switched over something along the lines of she could stuff the whole lot. She would have to fight the two roly polys first! Its enough to turn me vegetarian:puke:





Yes, it's a little bit too soon since these two were on together. Not good TV viewing.
 
It was like Carry On Chomping wasn't it?

Anne: Hauld on - whit hav we git here? Item number 763623 King's Realm 2 Sandwich Steaks and Burrrrgerrrr pack. £35.67 with £90 p&p - Andrew, while I slavvvver ovver your burrrgerrrs plstb teltin' us whit's in this pack...

Andrew: Well, quite simply Anne you have 2 in number of the sandwich steaks, and 2 in number of the premium quality burgers. Perfect for one meal for a hungry person like me - or to split into several meals for your thin friends.

Anne: Mmm. Oa yis, this is luvvly this mmm - this is rilly guid meat this Andrew, oa yis. Hi - you, Gail make shoor you save me some more of that burrrggerrr theer. *stabs fork into 6 steaks and shoves them in in a one-y*. Right, and nixt we've goat somethin' ah've bin rilly llllooookin' forward to - and that's item number 635374 the King's Realm Premium Sawsij Box. Can you be teltin' us whit's in this Androo?

Andrew: Indeed I can. Here you have 3 in number of our premium quality sausages - made with 100% dead pig and nothing else. And I think these, priced at £97 plus £50 p&p represent really good value when you consider the way our animals are farmed. We breed happy pigs - we take them on day trips to Filey, we give them a run on the beach and a nice stick of candy floss before taking them on the Ghost Train and tucking them into their little piggy bunk beds at night. We lead them off smiling and laughing to the abbatoir (in fact we play them a tape of Norman Wisdom going 'Ohhh Mr Grimsdale...' all the way there, just to keep them amused) then they're led in and shot by a laughing, smiling butcher with a gun that's got a smiley face on it just to keep things light...

Anne: Aw, that's brewwwwyant, rilly brewwwwyant. Well, I've been slavvering to git ma choaps round your sawsij sin' we started this oor Andrew and I haven't eaten since those 6 steaks a minute ago, so ah'm jist gonna sample a little bit of your little pink meaty comestible heer now...

Andrew: Ooh matron...mind you don't choke on it, it's rather big...

Anne: Oh dinnae yew be worryin' fer me, ken - ah'm jist deain' me joab. *forces another sawsij in* Oh...mmm. it's so meaty n sawsijy, this teests leyk sawsijs used te teest whin I wis a wee bairn ye ken. N can ye be teltin' us Gail the bist way to surrrrvvve thees?

Gail: Well, I've just very simply griddled these on the griddle with the griddle thing and now I'm just going to artfully arrange them on this chopping board like so *squidges sausage with knife to show how undercooked it is*

Anne: Luvvly, rilly luvvly. *shoves another sausage in*
 
I have just been laughing so hard CG to your poast one of my boxer dogs came running in to see what was wrong. Then along came the other one "As Weeeelllllll "
:mysmilie_483::mysmilie_483::mysmilie_483:
 
Thanks for that CG: I am now battling to keep my mind's eye carefully blank in case images of AD sampling greasy Andrew's "pink meaty comestible" seep in...

:devil:
 
Well that's the tea I planned gone out the window - was going to do sausages but just the thought of them conjures up some rather unpleasant images. Couldn't possibly eat one now - thanks cg!!:sad:
 
Thank you one and all - although my apologiz to anyone having a nice grilled snorker and tommy sauce for their tea (or thinking of having - susie59 :wink: )

Just be thankful I didn't mention Andrew and Anne's Brie and Pate filled breasts (chicken). And their huge, big boned racks. Of lamb. Lamb. I meant lamb. Or his rolled boned joint. Of pork.

*does Barbara Windsor style giggle, wiggles arse, runs off*
 
It was like Carry On Chomping wasn't it?

Anne: Hauld on - whit hav we git here? Item number 763623 King's Realm 2 Sandwich Steaks and Burrrrgerrrr pack. £35.67 with £90 p&p - Andrew, while I slavvvver ovver your burrrgerrrs plstb teltin' us whit's in this pack...

Andrew: Well, quite simply Anne you have 2 in number of the sandwich steaks, and 2 in number of the premium quality burgers. Perfect for one meal for a hungry person like me - or to split into several meals for your thin friends.

Anne: Mmm. Oa yis, this is luvvly this mmm - this is rilly guid meat this Andrew, oa yis. Hi - you, Gail make shoor you save me some more of that burrrggerrr theer. *stabs fork into 6 steaks and shoves them in in a one-y*. Right, and nixt we've goat somethin' ah've bin rilly llllooookin' forward to - and that's item number 635374 the King's Realm Premium Sawsij Box. Can you be teltin' us whit's in this Androo?

Andrew: Indeed I can. Here you have 3 in number of our premium quality sausages - made with 100% dead pig and nothing else. And I think these, priced at £97 plus £50 p&p represent really good value when you consider the way our animals are farmed. We breed happy pigs - we take them on day trips to Filey, we give them a run on the beach and a nice stick of candy floss before taking them on the Ghost Train and tucking them into their little piggy bunk beds at night. We lead them off smiling and laughing to the abbatoir (in fact we play them a tape of Norman Wisdom going 'Ohhh Mr Grimsdale...' all the way there, just to keep them amused) then they're led in and shot by a laughing, smiling butcher with a gun that's got a smiley face on it just to keep things light...
Anne: Aw, that's brewwwwyant, rilly brewwwwyant. Well, I've been slavvering to git ma choaps round your sawsij sin' we started this oor Andrew and I haven't eaten since those 6 steaks a minute ago, so ah'm jist gonna sample a little bit of your little pink meaty comestible heer now...

Andrew: Ooh matron...mind you don't choke on it, it's rather big...

Anne: Oh dinnae yew be worryin' fer me, ken - ah'm jist deain' me joab. *forces another sawsij in* Oh...mmm. it's so meaty n sawsijy, this teests leyk sawsijs used te teest whin I wis a wee bairn ye ken. N can ye be teltin' us Gail the bist way to surrrrvvve thees?

Gail: Well, I've just very simply griddled these on the griddle with the griddle thing and now I'm just going to artfully arrange them on this chopping board like so *squidges sausage with knife to show how undercooked it is*

Anne: Luvvly, rilly luvvly. *shoves another sausage in*



*Wets self, just a little*
:mysmilie_483::mysmilie_483:
 

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