Hi Andie,
If it means anything at all, I have to say that I'm not remotely surprised about the anxiety attacks, I'm prone to getting them when I'm going through extreme stress or grief or any kind of harrowing experience. Don't know whether it would help you or not, but I've been on anti-depressants for a few years now, and the ones I'm on, Sertraline, are meant to help with panic and anxiety. It might be worth asking your GP if they would be suitable, even for a very short time, sometimes it's useful to have something to just help you through these things. Also, please try the Bach Flower Remedies, particularly the Rescue remedy, available from Boots and health shops, and have a look at the others in the range specifically for grief. I used them for ages and I know many other people in difficult situations have used them, too. Completely safe and natural, no side effects.