Piecan

Merry Christmas to you xxxx

Lovely to hear from you. I can imagine how upset you must have felt handing the cat over. Rob would be very proud of you for continuing to care for these cats. I often think it's not so much that you find the cats as that they find you or it's meant to be that you come across them as you will do the right thing for them. My friend is a volunteer fosterer for the Cat Action Trust and has a whole squad of cats in her home at any one time. Some of the stories of the way she comes across these poor cats would break your heart. One of my cats was from the litter of a mother cat that was found living in a dustbin in a back alley. We think the mother was possibly a Christmas present kitten and got pregnant in her first season and so was kicked out to fend for herself. The litter were days old when they were discovered. My friend took them home and found homes for them all - carefully checking the new owners out first. xxx

Hi Andie,
Dropping by again to see how you're doing? I think of you often and wonder how you are.
Fi xxx

Me again.
Hope you don't mind, but I've just been looking at your albums and wanted to say how fabulous they are.
I'm so glad that you have the picture of Rob at the Vitality show among them. It's a great photo and he looks happy, even if he was one of very few men there!
Also love the photo of you on your Dad's knee, it's lovely, and he looks such a kind man, and very proud of his wee girl.
As to the cats, well, what can I say? gorgeous pics, and Aimee as a youngster in her basket is just so cute. What beautiful cats you've shared your life with. It would be hard to decide whether one of them or my Bunty was the furriest cat in history, but they must all be in contention for the title lol
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hi Andie,
I haven't forgotten you. Not been on the forum much lately because I've had a bit of a trying time hospital-wise. But I wanted to stop by and let you know that I think of you often and wonder how you are. I know that everything will still seem incredibly hard and as soon as you feel any better, you seem to drop right back again. As I said before, there's no easy way through this period, and all you can do is try to ensure that your health doesn't suffer too much due to all the things your mind will be putting you through.
Sending lots of love, Yo. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Sending you cyber hugs. I know exactly what you mean - after the first weeks when you seem able to dig deep and find that inner strength, it gets down to the simple fact of just missing the person you've lost. It's as if something inside is broken and you have to find a way of coping despite it feeling all wrong at first. You're a strong lady and I know you'll be fine and will find your way again.
If ever there is anything I can do, please give me a shout - I'm a good listener if you want a moan or a shoulder.
Take care and be kind to yourself.
Fi xx

Hi Andie,
Just wanted to pop by and ask how you are doing? It's dreadful once the initial shock starts to wear the numbness away and you suddenly find that weeks have passed by. I just wanted to let you know that I am thinking of you and sending you my warmest wishes.
Fi xxx

You're right, life is unfair, and when I look at some of the things getting people worked up on the forum, I'm afraid they seem pathetic.
Lots of love, and take your time through this period, don't try to make yourself do or think things you don't feel up to. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hi Andie,
If it means anything at all, I have to say that I'm not remotely surprised about the anxiety attacks, I'm prone to getting them when I'm going through extreme stress or grief or any kind of harrowing experience. Don't know whether it would help you or not, but I've been on anti-depressants for a few years now, and the ones I'm on, Sertraline, are meant to help with panic and anxiety. It might be worth asking your GP if they would be suitable, even for a very short time, sometimes it's useful to have something to just help you through these things. Also, please try the Bach Flower Remedies, particularly the Rescue remedy, available from Boots and health shops, and have a look at the others in the range specifically for grief. I used them for ages and I know many other people in difficult situations have used them, too. Completely safe and natural, no side effects.

Hi Andie,
Just wanted to say hello and check how you're coping. I know that it's hell, and I just wanted you to know that I'm thinking about you everyday, and sending lots of love your way/ xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hi Andie,

Just dropping by to let you know that I often think about you and wonder how you are doing.
Having lost both my parents to this horrendous disease, I know the sense of shock and unfairness of it all you will be feeling. I hate the expression that "time heals" - it doesn't but, with time, you find ways to cope and get on with things.
I'm here most days if you ever want a chat, a moan, a shoulder, anything.
Take care xx

Sending you hugs and best wishes for this Christmas xxxxxxxxxxx

Aw Andie, I'm so proud of you for getting through it, even though it must have been agonising. Oftentimes, the days after the funeral can be very hard because you no longer have the practicalities of sorting out arrangements, and it can suddenly feel very odd indeed, so don't be hard on yourself if you find that your emotions are all over the place. Sadly, it's a long slow process, but all I can say is that with time it does get easier, the mind somehow finds a way of coping. Do go to your GP if you feel that you would benefit from bereavement counselling, or contact a Macmillan centre and talk to them about it; they can arrange time with a counsellor who only deals with people bereaved by cancer, so they are familiar with all the things that carers go through, both during the illness and afterwards. And don't forget that I would be happy to talk with you and offer any support I can.
I really feel for you and I'm willing you to be alright even though I know it's unbearably hard. xx

Been thinking about you, Andie, and hoping you managed to cope today.
Much love, Yo. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hi Andie,
You'll do Rob proud whatever happens, he would be so proud of you already for all that you have endured throughout this awful time with such grace and dignity. You know he loved and adored you and that is something that cannot be taken away.
I'll be thinking of you tomorrow and sending calming healing thoughts your way.
It's already cruel that life has dealt this tragic blow, but even more awful that it's happened at this time of year. Both my parents died during Easter week, albeit different years, and that makes Easter all the more poignant every year. My brother was just before Christmas, so I feel for you in that horrible sense of unreality when so many people are rushing round getting stressed over nothing, and you're dealing with something of epic proportions. It's not fair.
Try to eat and stay as physically strong as possible so that you don't make yourself ill, and remember that you're not alone, you have people who care very much that you be alright.
Much love Yo. xx

I shall be thinking about you on Thursday, Andie, and sending thoughts of strength your way. There's nothing anyone can do to take away your pain right now, but do know that you are loved and cared about and that people are here for you.
Lots of love to you, Yo. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Wishing you a very happy Christmas & a peaceful New Year Andie..
Love Alice & Birdy x x x

Rob sounds like my mum, she never got angry or upset about being so ill, she just wanted to get on with life and make the most of it. Very special people.
It's important now that you take the time to allow yourself some respite from all the fear and worry that you went through - I often think that cancer is hardest on those we are closest to - they have to keep their fears to themselves and bottle up so much emotion, which isn't easy.
I found when I was at my lowest after the deaths of those closest to me that I really immersed myself in my animals and in wildlife, almost forgetting my existence and thinking purely of the next feed, task, rescue or whatever. In many ways that got me through.I meant what I said about being here if you need to offload or just chat about things, I'd hate for you to think that you're all alone in the world, you're not, you have people who care and are willing you to find the strength to carry on and keep Rob's memory alive in you forever more. xxxxxxxx

Hi Andie,
Please never feel that you can't post anything because of me and my situation, it really wouldn't upset me, honestly. I'm probably too open about things, but it's simply that I don't have any family left, and Thing is useless, so I sometimes vent on here, just as a way of getting something off my mind, I suppose.
I'm afraid you're right, there isn't any sense to it, and it's random and cruel, and takes away some very special people, and puts their loved ones through absolute turmoil and hell. I don't have any beliefs, so I'm useless at trying to comfort someone with the usual platitudes about religion, I simply don't believe that a god would allow so much suffering.

Andie, I'm so very sad about Rob, and just wanted you to know that you and he are very much in my thoughts at this time. I can't begin to tell you how strongly I feel about your situation, and how angry I feel that life has dealt this shattering and devastating blow to you. I rage against the cruelty of this disease and any other that takes people away long before their time. My Dad was about the same age as Rob when he died, and there's such a sense of loss when people go so young. The chap in my avatar also died young of cancer, another truly wonderful and special person.
If you ever want to talk you can contact me, and I'll be here to listen.
Thinking about you. With love, Yo. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx